Increasing the amount of love in the universe
I believe love and language (the basis of reality) are cornerstones of existence. Increasing love in the universe makes the universe grow.
I withhold myself from love such as starting a family or going to church when I don't want to.
I haven't worked out why I don't want to. I don't think it is necessarily fear, it's just it's a lot of work and I don't want that work. This isn't very loving for the spirits in heaven that want me as a father. Caring for another being even a plant is hard.
I don't want to go to church because there are people to love and it's kind of a chore. It's pride or ego to think I know more than them. I am sure synchronicities would make it beneficial to go. But I still don't want to go.